The Incredible Mr. Write

Franchises, they're unpredictable. Some are like old friends who bring back fond memories of good times, while others are like that out-of-work cousin who's bunked on your living room couch, eaten all your Funyuns and overstayed their welcome. In the case of Jurassic World: The Fallen Kingdom , I submit it's time for this particular franchise to hit the road. As a big fan of the classic 1993 original, I tend to view its sequels through nostalgic spectacles. Maybe it's because it landed smack-dab in the roaring nineties, maybe it's because I've always loved dinos, or maybe it's cuz my heart skips a beat every time I hear the soaring strains of John Williams' iconic score. Whatever the reason, I always hope for the same thrill ride as when I visited Isle Nublar so many years ago. Unfortunately, the ride is quickly losing its charm. So without further ado, let's jump into this one, shall we? SPOILERS AND VAGUELY FAMILIAR PLOTS AHEAD! I'm...

WARNING: THIS REVIEW IS INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. OCCASIONAL SPOILERS AND POWER-UPS AHEAD! Alright, I'll admit: I was a little late logging into the hype of  Ready Player One (I kept getting dragged to other cinematic dumpster fires like Blockers , but that's a rant for another time). Luckily, I finally convinced the missus that a little jaunt down Geek Boulevard is just what the seventh Doctor ordered, and we plunked ourselves down in the dark to watch Spielberg weave his magic once again. Anyone who has seen this film can tell you it's undoubtedly a love-letter to geeks who came of age in the 80's and 90's. Geeks like me, who at the ripe old age of 35, still get a chill of excitement when we power up the ol' PS4 and dive into our own digital oasis for an hour -- or ten. In fact, if you're not a bona fide geek then at least a handful of references may be lost on you, but thankfully what is abundantly clear is the overall universal theme of...

  WARNING: POTENTIAL SPOILERS AND GENERAL FUN-RUINING AHEAD!   Alright, well, with the customary disclaimer out of the way, let's crack on, shall we? Summer is nearly upon us and that means longer days, hotter weather and of course, blockbuster films we flock to like some long-awaited pilgrimage to a fanboy Mecca, where we shamelessly gorge ourselves on a large popcorn and a bladder-busting Cherry Coke! Kicking off this summer is the flick every comic book geek both young and old has awaited like it was the second coming of Captain America: Avengers: Infinity War!  As I write this review, the film is still vibrantly fresh in my mind, having only hours ago spent two and a half hours of my precious weekend immersing myself in the grand spectacle that is the most anticipated installment in the MCU. I can say this with utmost certainty: it is at once a glorious popcorn film, checking all the boxes for fun and nonstop high-octane action, while simultaneous...

Well, it's been a minute, hasn't it? Since we've I've last blogged a review, the summer has seen it's share of movies both good and others not so much. Many of these flicks left barely an impression and were forgotten almost as soon as my popcorn was gone. Rarely did I anticipate any particular film's release with any sense of anticipation or apprehension, with perhaps the exception of the subject of my next cinematic diatribe: Star Wars: The Last Jedi.  Sequels are stubborn things. They can either outshine and compliment the original, or fall disastrously short and leave you pining for the magic of the original title. I've never found a sequel I've been indifferent to and TLJ is no exception. Since it's release, it's been praised or lambasted with equal fervor for reasons both good and, well, not. From the opening scene, evoking a World War II bombing run and more physics-defying action than you could shake a Bantha at, to to the semi-satisf...